AHA! or, It's been awhile.

It's been a little while since we've talked about an important subject:

Now that Pluto may have regained its status as the largest object in the outer solar system, should astronomers consider giving it back another former title — that of full-fledged planet?

Pluto was demoted to a newly created category, "dwarf planet," in 2006, partly because of the discovery a year earlier of Eris, another icy body from Pluto's neighborhood. Eris was thought to be bigger than Pluto until Nov. 6, when astronomers got a chance to recalculate Eris' size.

Now it appears that Pluto reigns — though only by the slimmest of margins (the numbers are so close as to be nearly indistinguishable, when uncertainties are taken into account).

This came up in the news last week but I didn't get a chance to blog about it because I was busy making Thanksgiving preparations (yeah, can we just take a moment to remember how much I love Thanksgiving? *contented sigh*).

But the time has come, my friends, for me to address this issue. And what I say is:

I TOLD YOU SO.

I'm glad that some experts are on board with this:

"If you take the IAU's definition strictly, no object in the solar system is a planet," said Alan Stern, a planetary scientist at the Southwest Research Institute in Boulder, Colo. "No object in the solar system has entirely cleared its zone."

The definition also sets different standards for planethood at different distances from the sun, according to Stern, who is principal investigator of NASA's New Horizons mission, which is sending a spacecraft to Pluto.

The farther away a planet is from the sun, the bigger it needs to be in order to clear its zone. If Earth circled the sun in Uranus' orbit, it wouldn't be able to clean out its neighborhood and would thus not qualify as a planet, Stern said.

"It's literally laughable," he told SPACE.com.

In Stern's view, a planet is anything that meets the IAU definition's first two criteria — the bits about orbiting the sun and having enough mass to be roughly spherical, without the "clearing your neighborhood" requirement.

So Pluto should be a planet, as should Eris and the dwarf planet Ceres (the largest body in the asteroid belt between Mars and Jupiter), as well as many other objects.

You all know my opinion on this. Let's give some love to Pluto.



Seriously, IAU, what's with the discrimination here?

Hope and change and a great, great day.

I'm relieved to see that someone is finally taking a stand in Illinois against sin and corruption. I'm glad that we finally are seeing the government using a firm hand to direct us through these troubling times. It gives me great peace of mind to see that someone is speaking out in favor of the wronged and oppressed.

I speak, of course, of the Illinois Senate Committee's unanimous vote in favor of declaring Pluto a planet. One can only hope that the full Senate follows their most excellent example.

Way to go, folks. Way to look out for the little people, especially that ever-so-small-but-oh-so-vital minority of Americans Who Have Discovered Planets Only to be Vilely Cheated Out of Their Legacy By a Minority of Dirty Scientists. (Population: Clyde Tombaugh, Streator, IL.)

And way to nip that scientific coup in the bud. In the words of Senate President John Cullerton:

"I supported Senator Dahl's effort even though I was kind of surprised that apparently Pluto was decommissioned as a planet by a vote of scientists. But he claimed the vote was a very small percentage of the scientists," Cullerton said. "So he . . . chose to have us basically appoint Pluto to be a planet rather than have a special election among the scientists."

Those scientists, always trying to keep the proletariat down!

Comments from the groundlings showed both support for the measure and contempt for the depth of corruption involved in the IAU's controversial decision:

"Guys I'm really sorry but I'm a sidin with a Republican so it must be a just cause. When I first heard of Plutos' demise I was as Uppity as all git out. You cannot deny a scientific fact and occupation of space by mass. gosh pretty scientific stuff that for an ignurante furriner like me. Galileo was recently pardoned by the Catholic Church when they admitted his theorys' were true regarding the earth and the sun revolving around one another or not. If as a species we try to dominate nature to such an extent that we deny certain scientifc facts to fit some 'pigeon hole of conformity/description'. We run the risk of losing our own identity in time." --cpndodgee, Concerned Internet Citizen

"The Illinois legislature has more sense than those four percent of the International Astronomical Union, most of whom interestingly are not planetary scientists. That vote was hijacked by a small group with its own agenda of excluding Pluto and artificially limiting the number of planets in our solar system. That is why it was opposed by hundreds of professional astronomers in a petition led by Dr. Alan Stern, Principal Investigator of NASA's New Horizons mission to Pluto, and it is why both scientists and lay people are working to get the demotion overturned. Pluto is a planet because it is spherical, meaning it is in a state of hydrostatic equilibrium, where its own gravity has pulled itself into a round shape. That is a hallmark of planets, not of asteroids and comets.
It is this tiny minority of the IAU who erroneously believe they are rulers of the world. They're not. They cannot change facts, and Pluto's planethood is a fact." -- laurele, Concerned Internet Citizen

This is, indeed, a momentous event. I am humbled and thankful indeed that the pleas of the oppressed are finally being heard. As you may remember, I have spoken on this issue before, and I must admit that I am moved almost to tears to see The Cause gaining support on a governmental level. Maybe now we can begin to heal.

Hang in there just a little bit longer, Pluto. Your time is coming, and that right soon.

The wounds obviously haven't healed yet.

xkcd.com

I think she was absolutely right on this one.

The IAUWGPSN; or, Democracy in Action?

And now, bringing you the latest update on a subject dear to our collective heart:

Pluto is now called a plutoid. Plutoids, for those of you who don't know, are

"[...] celestial bodies in orbit around the sun at a distance greater than that of Neptune that have sufficient mass for their self-gravity to overcome rigid body forces so that they assume a hydrostatic equilibrium (near-spherical) shape, and that have not cleared the neighborhood around their orbit." In short: small round things beyond Neptune that orbit the sun and have lots of rocky neighbors.

I can tell you, I'm certainly breathing a sigh of relief here. Back in 2006 when the International Astronomical Union cruelly stripped Pluto of its planetary status, I was worried that Pluto would remain unclassified forever, wandering around its uncleared orbit forever just wondering what it was and where it came from. Now it only has to wonder where it came from. However,

it remains to be seen whether astronomers will use the new term.

"My guess is that no one is going to much use this term, though perhaps I'm wrong," said Caltech astronomer Mike Brown, who has led the discovery of several objects in the outer solar system, including Eris. "But I don't think that this will be because it is controversial, just not particularly necessary."

Brown was unaware of the new definition until the IAU announced it today.

"Back when the term 'pluton' was nixed they said they would come up with another one," Brown said. "So I guess they finally did."

Who do we have to thank for this amazing act of astronomical confidence boosting? Who is the new superhero in the galaxy, bringing justice and handles to abandoned ex-planetoids everywhere? Who ya gonna call?

The International Astronomical Union Working Group for Planetary System Nomenclature, of course!

Say what?

Okay, okay, okay. It was really proposed by the IAUCSBN (International Astronomical Union Committee on Small Body Nomenclature). The IAUWGPSN only accepted it. Then the IAU Executive Committee approved it.

Say what?

You mean not only does it take them 2 years to come up with something "better" than "pluton", but they also have not one, not two, but three whole committees that it has to go through? Two of which appear to exist solely for the purpose of coming up with names for planet-type stuff? And "plutoid" is what they give us?

Puh-leeeeeze.

I guess they're only members of the IAU because they couldn't get an honest job as a real astronomer. You know it's bad when the people you're supposed to represent say outright that they're not going to pay attention to you anymore. At least the IAU has a good attitude about it, though.

"The IAU is a democratic organization, thus open to comments and criticism of any kind," IAU General Secretary Karel A. van der Hucht told SPACE.com by email today. "Given the history of the issue, we will probably never reach a complete consensus."

I think they've got that right. I don't see them agreeing with me anytime soon that they've messed this affair up from the get-go.

For a more scientific opinion, click here.

For Erin; or, Vindication for the Dwarf

First off, let me just say that life was great on Friday because I got to see Erin again. It's been almost two years, which is really too long, and Shallow Man and I had a blast hanging out with her and her sister and brother-in-law. And their turtles. But I digress.

Erin informed me that, amazingly enough, there are in fact people who read my blog (maybe even as many as six of them). And therefore, she told me, I need to update more often. I told her contritely that I would try to be more diligent about that, and vowed that as soon as something interesting happened to me, I would blog about it.

Well, not much interesting has happened to me yet, but in the interrim, and because I told Erin I would, I would just like to say that it's about time somebody gave proper recognition to deserving dwarves.

Okay...

I feel a bit better about this whole thing now.

This statement was released by Disney's Seven Dwarves today in response to Pluto's demotion:

"Although we think it's Dopey that Pluto has been downgraded to a dwarf planet, which has made some people Grumpy and others just Sleepy, we are not Bashful in saying we would be Happy if Disney's Pluto would join us as an eighth dwarf. We think this is just what the Doc ordered and is nothing to Sneeze at."

At least someone is sticking up for the underdog.

I was rooting for you, Pluto!

Astronomers, man. Weird people.

Always doing crazy things, those astronomers are. When they're not moving in and trying to steal each others' observatories and fending each other off with microscopes, they're messing with the solar system.

I mean, for heaven's sake. My very energetic mother just served us nine? Don't leave us hanging like that! I mean, it was bad enough when we were potentially talking about how my very energetic mother couldn't just slice up nine pizzas, comely xenophobe. Of course, we weren't even sure that would work because nobody could make a definite decision on whether the series would end in "X" for "Xena" or "U" for "2003 UB313." (Huh. Speaking of dumb planet names...)

So the crazy astronomers took the lazy way out. Rather than persevere until an answer to the X/U debate could be found, they just cut corners... and cut Pluto.

Why couldn't they just leave my very energetic mother and her pizzas alone? All we wanted to do was have dinner as a family. Who cares if maybe you have two or three friends over now and then? Just because you don't want to let Ceres, Charon and...whatshisname live in the house doesn't mean you have to kick out little brother Pluto. There were nine in the system and the astronomers said, "Roll over, roll over!" So they all rolled over and Pluto fell out...

I mean, we haven't even known about Pluto for a full day of Pluto time. I suppose this means Pluto's fifteen Pluto minutes of fame are over. Just goes to show you how fleeting celebrity is these days. Poor little guy.

Apparently, for crazy astronomers at least, size does matter.

YOU'RE NEXT, MARS!


RIP Pluto: 1930-2006